The most common thing I've heard is, "I wish I could wipe my memory clean, there's too much in my life". At instances like these I usually open my mouth to say something but always instead resort to smiling until my mind floats away to my lalaland. I happen to visit it a lot.
If all of us of could actually choose what happens to us, I doubt anyone would ever choose a painful experience. My personal belief is we avoid pain for several reasons. Ofcourse, there's the evolutionary sense that we are built to survive and any signal of pain might mean a threat to our existence. Again, I'll leave it to Charles Darwin to argue on this one. But on an emotional level, there's a deep sense of shame attached to it. When any one of us goes through a painful experience, the first thing that we think is, there's something wrong with us. We scream, we shout, we deny it like children and then we give up. Our sense of self is threatened, ultimately, leading to the notion something is wrong with our lives. This was not what we ordered from the cosmic menu.
Pain is the first sign that yes, our lives are changing and there is no way that we can stop it.
Life happens, not to specific set of people but to everyone. We live in an ever changing world. Ask anyone and they are fighting their own battle, no matter how successful they are. And the most common thing I've heard during these times? "Oh, everything is God's Will, something good will come out of it". You check back on them after 6 months and your mouth drops open to see them in shambles. I'm no saint but I know God/Allah/Source/ Universe is only Love and this is definitely not what He had on His Mind for anyone.
As far as my understanding of the world goes, everything that happens is meant to happen the exact same way, otherwise it wouldn't have happened. There is absolute perfection in the Divine Chaos. If you feel otherwise then just for today, sit under the night's sky and look at the world, at everything around you, can you think of anything that is really missing? Everything from the wind to the slightest movement of a single leaf is in perfection with everything else around it. So how can anyone of us really buy the notion, that there is something wrong with our lives especially when we are a single drop in the pool of it all?
We plan every single day of what we want our lives to look like. The non-stop chatter, I'll do this and I'll do that and pow! reality happens and suddenly we realize we have been derailed and are thrown in a completely new direction. The truth is, life is never really in our control.
A friend and I had an argument on this, one day. He said, "well tell you what, don't move to eat and let's see if God puts the food right in your mouth, then we will talk about this". So I said, fine and funny thing is, only that day, my 3 year old niece came thrice and ended up literally stuffing things from biscuits, sandwiches to her milk bottle in my mouth, without me asking a single time. I won the argument.
Now please note, I'm not implying that don't do anything and you will still yield results, what I'm trying to say is, life is happening to us every second of the day in ways that we can't notice even. Our hearts are beating perfectly, our brains are functioning, well in most cases, without any interference from us.
When things fall apart, its not life that really falls apart, its our sense of self/other that breaks down. We all live in a bubble that at one hand protects us and at the other hand prisons us. It give us a sense of identity, a feeling of belonging, the feeling that we are safe. Anytime, anything happens which is not familiar to us, we go running back to that bubble and when we find its gone, that's when the pain sets in. While I'm no masochist, I do believe there's a gift in pain if only we are willing to stop grasping and clinging to what we want.
Pain helps us to grow as individuals. None of us would ever leave our comfort zone, if there was no pain. Life is designed not to give us what we want, but provide us with the experiences that we need to in order to complete the evolution of our human cycle, in the time frame given to us. Once this is completed we can return to the Source. Finally, return to God.
The only choice that we are left with is, what do we want to do with what is given to us? There's a certain freedom that comes with the idea that everything is perfect. I don't know about the rest, but for me, it always has faith and hope to it. There's a sense, things will fall exactly where they are suppose to and all we have to do is really enjoy the ride. Once the blocked energy is freed, life itself becomes a gift. It literally becomes limitless. And that's how I believe God wanted us to be - Beyond any limits on a path to freedom.
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